Friends in the LNP

The question is, are there any friends in the LNP?

And if there are, what are those friendships really worth?

Friends in the LNP.


The LNP as an entity has many different parts

Their leader Tony Abbott, is renowned  for his brain farts

His loyalty is legendary, for those who tow the party line

Unless your name is Barnaby, then stupidity is fine

They claim the moral high ground calling lies from all the rest

But the truth is when it comes to lies, the LNP are best


Turnbull as the leader did a deal with Kevin Rudd

But Abbott didn’t like it, started baying for his blood

So he stabbed his colleague in the back, to renege upon the deal

Claimed the leadership by one vote, his ambition for to seal

Then he set a new agenda for himself to gain ‘The Lodge’

Based on lies and obfuscation, while the truth and facts he’d dodge


With a platform lacking substance from a vacuous policy pit

He chose a front bench full of lackeys, who were happy talking shit

His finance spokesman Hockey, for numbers doesn’t have a nose

In fact he cannot count past ten, without access to his toes  

Yet he gets to spout his dribble cos he’s Tony Abbotts mate

Despite the fact his mouth starts early, while his brain is running late


His deputy, Julie Bishop, is a classy piece of work

Immaculately presented, doesn’t mean she’s not a jerk

Looking prim but with a sour pucker, like her knickers are in a knot

with a mouthful of all day sucker, she is great at talking rot

She delivers lines that are well rehearsed repeating Abbotts spin

While proving quite conclusively, there’s nothing much within


The Abbott was honoured speaker at Pete Slippers Nuptials

But four years on he wanted Slipper gone, thought he had him by the balls

With Mal Brough in the shadows, ripe to take the Slippers seat

Slipper jumped ship, to the cross benches, just to prove he’s slippery Pete

So he stepped up to the speakers chair, to piss off his ex mates

But then up popped Pyne’s mate Ashby, with his own brand of.. arsegates


Mirrabella’s nasty friendships, are unhealthy ones at best

By displaying moral bankruptcy, she sadly fails the test

With her sociopathic tendencies, she’s always on the take

Proving as a human being, Tony’s  Sophie is a fake

But he keeps her on the front bench, cos her loyalty is strong

Though on oh so many levels, Tony’s Sophie’s is plain wrong


Little Kelly O’Dwyer says that she’s “The Handbag Hit Squads” author

But proudly selling out her gender, proves she is a moral pauper

She lies without a second thought, ignoring fact and reason

While repeating Abbotts spin and lies is tantamount to treason

But it’s no consequence to Kelly, cos she’s Liberal through and through

And to win the next election, they will do what they must do


Tony’s good mate Alan Jones is really something else again

From hate filled gross misogyny, he really can’t refrain

And the normal bounds of decency are nowhere to be seen

In the sociopathic ramblings of this nasty closet queen

He’s an expert in most everything, in his mind anyway

Quoting facts, beyond dispute, cos he made them up just yesterday  


There is Gina and her billions, pulling hard on Abbotts strings

Aligned with Jones, her rabid right wing views are enticing little things

To Abbott and his motley crew who believe to rule, they’re surely born

So their spin and lies, they’ll justify, treating all of us with scorn

But don’t criticise their Tony, or they’ll start some argie bargie

Bringing out the liberals big guns, Tony Abbotts good wife Margie


And she’ll tell us what a good good man her little Tony is

How he watches Downton Abbey, and in the house he’s just a wiz

How he’ll shed a tear at movies and he’s a bonza father too

How he really “gets” his women, and he’s honest through and through

And his mates in the mainstream media, report it like a scoop

That a wife supports her husband, what a load of doggie poop


So Margie, Tony’s a lucky man to have a wifey, just like you

But Pol Pot’s wives supported him, and Pol Pot, he had two

So there’s nothing so unusual, about these little farces

Of wives supporting husbands, who the people know, are arses

And although you both desire the lodge to be your new address

It’ll take more than your love story, regurgitated in the press


And the Abbotts time is running short as the sharks are closing in

Cos his misogynistic attitudes, are deeper seated than his spin

And friendships in the LNP, won’t be worth a dollar token

As they all desert the sinking ship, of a leader badly broken

And the moral for Margie’s intervention, brought on by her husbands panic

Is that you’ll dodge the Lodge, when you’re married to.. the Liberals own.. Titanic





About Truth Seeker

Musician singer/songwriter, guitar teacher.
This entry was posted in Political Poems and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Friends in the LNP

  1. WhitWords says:

    Great poem mate.
    You picked him apart nicely.
    The man’s a total grub.
    I’m sure he’s psychopathic.
    Thanks for the post.


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